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Going with the gut –

A rainy, dreary, cold, PDX afternoon…. Back from errands, haircut, picking up this and that, etc.

Back home and ready to begin the back side of my “resist” quilt ….

Hearing the inner voice and following it

When I look at something, I sometimes hear a voice that says yes or no. Sometimes it isn’t clear and other times it is VERY loud & clear- as it was in this case (with this back side of my “resist quilt”). Sooo my next step is to go  forward without 2^nd guessing myself or re-thinking what I have just heard or “auditioning” another fabric, or trying a different design line or whatever else I can think up to distract myself from what I have felt with my gut.

This is why I like piecing the backs of my quilts- it’s a free space, something that is just for me without the pressure of knowing it will be seen by others.  The back side is a surprise when the quilt is turned over – but it can not be seen when the piece is hanging on a wall.  This gives me a freedom that makes me feel like I can follow the voice I hear without all the worrying thoughts of “Is this good enough?”  or “what if I make a mistake?” (This is the negative voice I hear when working on the front side of a piece that makes me doubt myself.)  My next step is to allow myself to distill this inner voice of knowing and go with what I hear, freely, on the front sides- the visible sides of my quilts. This is my next growth challenge.  And this is another instance of the process of quilting as a metaphor for my life process.

It’s Saturday morning and I am propped up in bed like a princess (and I certainly like “princess” better than “Crone”)…it is the first day in eons that I feel I  deserve to give myself a day off .. that I have done enough so that I can give myself just 3-4 hours to lounge in my bed with a cup of coffee (James is  at work so I have the house to myself), just sit here and be myself and sink into my life; myself; my core.  The exhale; the letting go.  And as I sit here, exhaling- I think of what I have done … a zillion tax papers and forms and the “accountant Worksheet” ready to be copied and sent to tax guy (why this task feels as yucky it does – who knows and who cares –I just put my head down and get it done).

#Resist

And in the Conscious Quilting corner of my life –Just finished my “resist” letters (photo) – the main element of the piece I have started to work on for the “Threads of Resistance Challenge”—I am not sure what I am doing next with these elements – These pink and very pink and chartreuse yellow green letters just popped into my head and I had to make them.  (note – if you read last entry you see that this has superseded last entry about “the orange challenge” – all orange fabric back in stash.)  {I digress—I guess it is easy to see why I love James Joyce – anyway}

In addition to finishing my “resist” letters had a healing session with a client yesterday. And EVERYTIME I work with someone, it turns out it is as much for me as it is for them.  The “seed” of her session was- in order to achieve aligned movement (or flow) in the right direction, one must learn to relax from the (our) clenching and  pushing energies (Which are moving in opposite directions). This is a necessary first step.  Let your entire body relax and let out a very deep and long exhale.  And when the next inhale begins, stand –plant your feet solidly and feel the pull upward from above the crown of your head, while you are sending your energy upward from every cell in your body. Then the pushing and pulling energies are aligned and moving in the same direction.

SO, I am following my own advice and staying in bed and exhaling. And taking my time to greet this day…Knowing once I leave this bed I will go to my design wall and stare at my “resist” letters  and try and figure out what  I’ll do next.

 

My first entry on my new web site … always for me the question of how to begin   … where to start.  And this applies to everything I do…art making especially.  How do I begin a new project?  There are 2 call for entries that I “should” begin-  SAQA regional “Bridge” show and also CFG “Heatwave/Orange” challenge.  And in fact I did pull fabric and start designing a piece (photo of fabrics) but somehow it wasn’t resonating- so fabrics went back to stash.  I decided to work on a “Cloth Portal” piece… and it is going well.  THEN I saw the call for entry for “Threads of Resistance”! I have never before created political art …NOW IS THE TIME!